Thursday, October 13, 2011

A "Help"ing Hand in Parenting

Several weeks ago, I went to see the movie, "The Help".  It was amazing.  I laughed, cried, cheered, and even felt convicted about my parenting.

Now, I am not going to spoil the movie for you, in case you haven't seen it, but I will explain a bit more what I am talking about.  There is a character in the movie who has a young daughter that does not meet her mother's expectations where beauty is concerned.  She is a little chunky monkey, with some rolls, and chubby little cheeks that just make you want to kiss 'em.  Her mother is appalled by this however, and distances herself from the child.

However, this child has a Nanny, one of the main characters in the movie.  Each morning, the Nanny cuddles with this precious darling and says to her:
"You is Kind.  You is Smart.  You is Important."


If you were to ask me how often I tell my children that they are cute, or handsome, or pretty, I could answer "all the time".  If you had asked me a couple of weeks ago how often I tell my children they are important, or kind, or smart?  Sadly, not nearly as often.  Now?  I tell them every day. 


This one statement in a movie really made me reconsider what qualities I am emphasizing as good with my kids.  I want them to know that they are compassionate, kind, caring, funny, smart, good dancers, honest, and so many other things that are such rarities in today's world. (Yes, being a good dancer is a rarity, but I say that because it is a passion of my son's).  Today we are surrounded by bullies, negative media, snark blogs, peer pressure, and so many other sources of negativity, that I want to make sure that my kids always know what they have to offer this world.  I don't ever want them to think that they are worthless.  


Along the same lines, I have to share what a fellow blogger, Anna, from An Inch Of Gray , has taught me in the last month.  On September 8th, she lost her 12 year old son, Jack, to the floods that ravaged the North East United States.  Of course her entire family is devastated, but she has been blogging through the pain, sharing all the ways that God has revealed Himself to them in the last month.  *I will tell you, if you choose to read her blog, please have tissues handy, and be prepared for her to be incredibly real.  She is a mother that is mourning deeply the loss of her son, and is questioning the surrounding circumstances.  However, she is still a shining example of grace in tragedy.*

One of the greatest things that Anna has taught me through her posts, is that each day she would tell her children, "I am proud to be your mom."  Of course, coming off of reading her emotional posts about losing Jack, I sobbed and held my children for hours and days afterwards.  But another thing that I did, was start telling them how proud I am that I get to call them my kids.  I think it is just as important for them to know that, as it is for them to know that I think they are cute, or handsome.


Ugh, what is up with me lately?  I have been so emotional the last couple of posts.  I will try to return to the super light-hearted self in the very near future.


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